Cormega Ft. AZ, Redman, & Styles P: ‘MARS (Dream Team)’

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Mega’s new album, Philosophy, is out today. M.A.R.S. was the name of his super group (Action Bronson, Roc Marciano, and Saigon) that we didn’t hear much from so I guess this is a play on that with new, more popular members. By the way, speaking of super groups, as a former stutterer there should be a super group made of rappers with speech impediments: AZ, RZA, Kool G. Rap, and Rhymefest–with Biz Markie as hypeman. I’d take them over Slaughterhouse.

Cormega’s original M.A.R.S.:

-Dewan Gibson

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DMX Prefers To Eat Wet Dog Food Over Dry

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Not only does wet dog food smell like Popeye’s gravy, but it’s also a lot easier to make a crack pipe with a can than it is with a bag.

-Dewan Gibson

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Man Arrested For Molesting Rottweiler, Definitely Looks The Part

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On the hipster or sex offender picture continuum he leans just slightly towards the latter. But just a little. “Interesting selfie, bro. Where’d you take it?” “Oh, that’s my picture from the Illinois Sex Offender Registry.” “Dope!” From the Chicagoist:

Prosecutors in downstate Edwardsville are seeking to have a man with a record of sexual abuse declared “sexually dangerous” after being arrested for allegedly molesting a Rottweiler puppy. Terry Wayne Davis, 44, was declared by one psychologist to not be sexually dangerous as defined under law, as well as fit to stand trial. Madison County prosecutors are seeking a second evaluation. According to the Alton Telegraph, Davis was indicted on three counts of sexual conduct with an animal, which his roommate allegedly witnessed.

-Dewan Gibson

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Meet Instagram’s Mr. Nasty Time: ‘I Eats The Booty’

mr.nasty.time

Instagram is officially becoming the new version of Craigslist’s Casual Encounters. If you notice Mr. Nasty Time likes women “probably about 18 on up,” which he probably made clear as a condition of his parole.

-Dewan Gibson

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Drugs Get The Best Of Insanely Large Man At Pitchfork Festival

pitchfork-festival-dude

Man, dude must have been taking elephant tranquilizer. Must be the new thing to do when Danny Brown’s performing.

-Dewan Gibson

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