Much of the Western world has beef with Iran over their supposed development of nuclear weapons, which violates the international We Have Them You Can’t Treaty. War rhetoric from American evangelical politicians is heating up; in short, diplomacy is out the door because they’re unhappy with their lives on Earth and want to hurry up and get this rapture thingy started, which requires an intact Jewish state.
However, before the United States commits blood (young soldiers who joined to “see the world”) and treasure (money that could have been used to better this country by giving the ultra-rich more tax breaks), we might want to get a better idea of whom we may fight–Deadly Female Ninjas!
The kunoichi (female ninjas) are skilled in crotch flips, use of poisonous weapons and assassinations. Plus they’re covered up so they blend in well with many of Iran’s women. More than 3,000 women signed up for ninja training, and more are expected considering 34% of young Iranian women are unemployed.
America has Chuck Norris and Bruce LeRoy, but I’m not sure we can out-ninja Iran. So we should consider inviting their windbreaker wearing president–who never said “Israel should be wiped off the map”–to D.C. to settle our problems like adults, by talking. Hopefully sometime soon, before the rapture.
Dewan Gibson: The Imperfect Blog