Two Wild Babies Under Two-Years-Old: Month One

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It’s been about a month since our youngest son Ca$$ius de-wombed. He spends most of his time on the titty so I haven’t gotten to know him too well yet. What I do know is that he’s always plotting with one eye open (as you can see in the picture below). With his slickness, I’m sure he’ll make a great Al-Qaeda operative in just 10 years or so. Also, he can fart with the best of them. His Negro tendencies seem to be developing in the form of an intolerance to lactose, which leads to crazy amounts of ass thunder.

Our oldest son, Nile The Brute, is handling the adjustment to the new baby well. The first few days he wanted to poke Ca$$ius’ eyes out and pulls his ears, which I kind of get, but now he just wants to kiss him and hold him. (I didn’t teach him that shit.) He’s also going through some strange daddy attachment, which could be due to the media telling him that his black dad is bound to leave him any day now. Recently I’ve tried to sit down with him and watch rap videos so he can feel more secure by seeing all the positive black male images out there and it’s helping quite a little bit. Thanks, Gucci Mane.

As for the me and the misses we’re doing great. I make her cry once her couple weeks to make sure it’s still real and so far so good. Of course she’s overdue for a ring and I’m finna-fixin’ to get on that, but I guess I should probably start working more than 10 hours a week. Well, either that or sell the Vicodin she got for post-natal recovery.

I’ll be sure to update you all (it’s a very small “you all”) every now and then. More importantly, if you’re trying to have babies remember, nothing works better than Doggystyle and prayer. Peace.

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Dewan Gibson: The Imperfect Blog

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2 Responses to “Two Wild Babies Under Two-Years-Old: Month One”

  1. Dr. Black Pepper Says:
    February 12th, 2013 at 7:47 am

    Congrats, and good luck.
    I worked at a pretty nice summer camp one year. There is NOTHING wilder than young boys. They’ll master the art of driving you insane. Fortunately, you have one decided advantage I didn’t, you can whoop dat azz. Strike fear.

    May your pimp hand stay strong.

  2. Dewan Says:
    February 13th, 2013 at 12:18 am

    Thanks, bruh! My pimp hand and my leather belt are strong and impatient.

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