Calling T.I.: We Need More Black Babies

Posted by Dewan Gibson | Filed under Humor, Social Comm

That's A Virile MF

That's A Virile MF

Much has been made of minority groups becoming the American majority sometime around 2040. Depending on your perspective this provoked either fear (the Minutemen) or led you to put corny bumper stickers on your Prius that read “Celebrate Diversity” or “Coexist” (ironically written in symbols of various religions that have been killing each other for years). But there’s no need for white people to hit that tanning booth just yet. According to new Census figures minorities are not taking over shit until at least 2050. Apparently stricter immigration laws and a lackluster economy have slowed minority population growth in the United States, much of which was coming from Hispanics and Asians. So as a proud black man (usually proud: except when my people started fighting at KFC over Oprah’s free chicken) I feel we need to do our part and help increase minority population growth. Here are five ways to encourage population growth among African Americans:

1) Remind us that in order to name our children Barack and Michelle we need to have at least two kids.

2) Start a hip-hop fertility beef. T.I. has six kids, 50 Cent only has one. Is the East Coast gonna let the South run shit like that?

3) Accept that the little boy living in your house who calls you by your first name is not your child. Go out and make a baby that’s going to call you “Dad” as opposed to “Deandre.”

4) Send an alert out to all blacks  in college that reads: Warning…unless we increase our population growth rates we cannot continue to have these poetry jams every week. It is extremely important that brothas with kufis and secret white girl fetishes have an opportunity to express themselves.

5) Black church membership is dwindling. Creflo Dollar needs to pay off his private jet and Bishop Eddie Long will tell you body shirts and Bentleys don’t come cheap.  Please remember these “men of the good book” need mass support from brainwashed loyal African American parishoners of limited means.

Not a Rich Pastor, but has a MEAN SHAG

Not a Rich Pastor, but has a MEAN SHAG

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Permalink | May 15th, 2009

5 Responses to “Calling T.I.: We Need More Black Babies”

  1. THE IMPERFECT BLOG Blog Archive Calling T.I.: We Need More … | WELCOME GIFTS 4 BABYS Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 3:24 pm

    [...] A smart blogger created an interesting post today on THE IMPERFECT BLOG Blog Archive Calling T.I.: We Need More …Here’s a short outlineGo out and make a baby that’s going to call you “Dad” as opposed to “Deandre.” 4) Send an alert out to all blacks in college that reads: Warning…unless we increase our population growth rates we cannot continue to have these poetry jams … [...]

  2. Jr Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 4:34 pm

    Mean Mean Shag!!!!!

  3. Dewan Gibson Says:
    May 15th, 2009 at 4:51 pm

    Man that shag has been processed, prayed upon and blessed by the Holy Spirit. A human alone cannot grow a shag so exquisite lol.

  4. Divo Says:
    May 16th, 2009 at 2:34 am

    Very clever 5 ways to keep the African American population growing …….Let’s make those babies! Although in all actuality they would be “blasian” they would still be considered black according to what you told me: “if your half, you just black!”

  5. : Shortage Of Doctors Proves Obstacle To Obama Goals at military army Says:
    June 10th, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    [...] THE IMPERFECT BLOG » Blog Archive » Calling T.I.: We Need More … [...]

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