Own A Mimi-Style Hang-On-The-D Shower Rod For $10

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Twitter erupted this morning with news of a sex tape from Mimi, who I just found out is not Mariah Carey (sorry, I haven’t been black for at least two years) but a star in one of those reality shows where the actors spend the season arguing and eventually fight during the reunion episode. Due to fear of penis envy I don’t watch many instructional videos, but I did see a clip and still frame of Mimi’s work. What I and others were shocked by was her ability to hang from a shower rod while her womb is shifted. Now everybody wants a screw-in shower rod and being the public servant that I am, I took it upon myself to find a great deal on one from Amazon. Enjoy and forward me your work if you’d like to have it reviewed.

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-Dewan Gibson

Watch: Naked Whooty Robs McDonald’s For Ice Cream

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Of course this happened in Florida where backwoods’ trollops tend to run wild once they join civilization. I couldn’t find any word of an arrest being made, but look for a brotha to find her soon (Daily Mail).

-Dewan Gibson

Twerk Team Mount Kilimanjaro: Donk Shaking From The Motherland

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From the continent that brought you math, writing, generational conflict of epic proportions, and of course, twerking. Man, Miley taught them well. Hold up, my bad…

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Stripper Posts Twerk Video, Man Offers ‘Deep’ Ass Eating

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You can see the video that led the guy to indirectly offer a deep ass eating here. I’d post it, but the twerk artist who stars in it lives in San Diego, as do I, and I don’t even feel like hearing all that from my 36 weeks pregnant fiance. So when you go to Walmart really late, you’re actually at the strip club?  *whooty accent*

-Dewan Gibson

Instagram Model Perfects Side-View Donk Selfie, Achieves Worldwide Fame

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You can’t help but to have an appreciation for a young woman that’s classy enough to only show the world the profile view of her ass (@yoventura).

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Twerk Team Maintains Fast Cheek Action To Slow Song

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Full speed ahead, better yet behind.

-Dewan Gibson

Is It Still High Fashion If Kate Moss Is Not Wearing Clothes?

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Shot by Terry Richardson, of course. And she’s still looking good, little frail thang, with seemingly little-to-no physical damage from long-term cocaine use.

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Beyonce Revisits Twerking, Does A Pretty Good Job

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Obviously we’ve seen Beyonce do this before, long before the twerking community became gentrified, but she put a little extra on it this time. Fast forward to the 1:30 mark.

-Dewan Gibson

Obama’s America: Comedian Forced To Work As Donk Model

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Uldouz Wallace, comedian and Instagram donk model (Instagram: @uldouz), also known as a poor man’s who just got his tax return before Big Meat Ray J came into her life version of Kim Kardashian. Is she funny? Who cares.

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-Dewan Gibson

Miley Cyrus Backing That Lil’ Thang Up In Concert

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From Miley Cyrus’ concert in Anaheim, California. Her cheeks have as much cushion as a lawn chair, but bless her heart for trying and inspiring others. Give it some time, it’ll grow. Might have to put a blessing up in her womb first.

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