Bucknaked Performance Artist Lays Egg With Her Snatch

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See, there’s a lot you can do with a degree in art history. The YouTube description of the “performance art” is below, which like the video, seems like a bunch of bull, especially since they block out the most interesting parts of the show.  Bravo!

Slowly the egg leaves the natal canal of the artist and smashes on the canvas, red colour flows out. The next egg contains another colour and so bit by bit, accompanied only by loud “Plops”, an abstract art work originates — archaically, uncontrollably and intuitively. At the end of this almost meditative art birth performance the stained canvas is folded up, smoothed and unfolded to a symmetrically reflected picture, astonishingly coloured and full of strong because universal symbolism.

The “PlopEgg Painting” itself releases a loose chain of thoughts — about the creation fear, the symbolic strength of the casual and the creative power of the femininity. A comparison to wild associations arises and by the intensity of the seen and experienced, one becomes clear: the art needs like so often the corporeity to be able to manifest itself.

-Dewan Gibson

Topless Students In China Protest For Gender Equality

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Their masks scream SARS, but I’m thinking they don’t want to show their faces due to cavemen haters who don’t want women to have equal rights, including the right to bare their breasts in public for all of the internet to see (Shangaiist).

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-Dewan Gibson

Prenatal Twerk Team: A Baby Can’t Stop This Show

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Twerking can lead to pregnancy (on the dance floor), but pregnancy shouldn’t stop you from twerking. What a beautiful cycle. Go on and twerk through labor.

-Dewan Gibson

Own A Mimi-Style Hang-On-The-D Shower Rod For $10

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Twitter erupted this morning with news of a sex tape from Mimi, who I just found out is not Mariah Carey (sorry, I haven’t been black for at least two years) but a star in one of those reality shows where the actors spend the season arguing and eventually fight during the reunion episode. Due to fear of penis envy I don’t watch many instructional videos, but I did see a clip and still frame of Mimi’s work. What I and others were shocked by was her ability to hang from a shower rod while her womb is shifted. Now everybody wants a screw-in shower rod and being the public servant that I am, I took it upon myself to find a great deal on one from Amazon. Enjoy and forward me your work if you’d like to have it reviewed.

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-Dewan Gibson

Watch: Naked Whooty Robs McDonald’s For Ice Cream

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Of course this happened in Florida where backwoods’ trollops tend to run wild once they join civilization. I couldn’t find any word of an arrest being made, but look for a brotha to find her soon (Daily Mail).

-Dewan Gibson

Twerk Team Mount Kilimanjaro: Donk Shaking From The Motherland

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From the continent that brought you math, writing, generational conflict of epic proportions, and of course, twerking. Man, Miley taught them well. Hold up, my bad…

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Stripper Posts Twerk Video, Man Offers ‘Deep’ Ass Eating

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You can see the video that led the guy to indirectly offer a deep ass eating here. I’d post it, but the twerk artist who stars in it lives in San Diego, as do I, and I don’t even feel like hearing all that from my 36 weeks pregnant fiance. So when you go to Walmart really late, you’re actually at the strip club?  *whooty accent*

-Dewan Gibson

Instagram Model Perfects Side-View Donk Selfie, Achieves Worldwide Fame

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You can’t help but to have an appreciation for a young woman that’s classy enough to only show the world the profile view of her ass (@yoventura).

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Twerk Team Maintains Fast Cheek Action To Slow Song

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Full speed ahead, better yet behind.

-Dewan Gibson

Is It Still High Fashion If Kate Moss Is Not Wearing Clothes?

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Shot by Terry Richardson, of course. And she’s still looking good, little frail thang, with seemingly little-to-no physical damage from long-term cocaine use.

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